Friday, April 20, 2012

Psalm 62. Trust in God Alone

Thank you for all that you have taught me in such short time- simply by being you.
... a post dedicated for you, Krysten..

I ran/walked 10 miles in the downpour yesterday night. By the last few miles my body felt so weak, but I was still 3 miles from home. I came close to calling for a ride, but something inside kept saying just a few more miles, just a few more. Physically it had been the least challenging, but mentally, the most debilitating.

In those last 3 miles I lost count of how many times I had start/stopped. I was so hungry. I pictured what waited for me at the end- a tall glass of almond milk, a sandwich, a hot shower and my bed.

I remained resilient, because I knew that seeing it to the end would make me even that much stronger.

When I finally made it home, after changing out of my wet clothes, I had all those things that I pictured and went to bed- falling asleep almost immediately.

I woke up this morning from an intense dream. I haven't had a lucid dream in such a long time that I can't even recall when the last time had been. This time, I was able to recognize that I was in the dream because I wasn't able to do, something I knew I could do if I were awake (but now can't remember what). I was in danger, so I looked down at my feet and thought really hard to change the scenery. At the same time I fought to stay in the dream. It's difficult to lucid dream and stay asleep because of how aware you are. At least for me.

I am happy with my subconscious. I know that I found rest from last night.

Most of this morning, I spent reading the Psalms and Book of Proverbs.

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